Networking Hard Or Hardly Networking?

I have a coffee meeting on Wednesday with someone whom I met at an event about 2 weeks ago. He’s a friend-of-a-friend (remember FOAF?).

I don’t know why I am meeting him.

Well, I do know. As the owner of a small company, I must get out there (hashtag hustle, as the kids say) to build relationships that will lead to projects that will lead to big, cash prizes! I think I am doing it wrong.

In the case of this week’s meeting, I don’t have an agenda, I don’t want something specific from him, and I’m not going to offer him something specific that endears him to me. I’m going solely to meet a new person and see.

Too deep a cut?

This is part of why I feel like I’m terrible at networking. (I’m also a classically-trained Introvert, but that’s another story for another time.) I hear people talk about their networking and it sounds like they are out to take something from other people: time, business, money. The idea being to frame that taking in the guise of an offering.

I don’t want to take from people. I’m interested in meeting interesting people. If something comes of it, great. If not, I had coffee. Perhaps I am too enamored by serendipity; the idea that some moment in the conversation will spark an idea that becomes an opportunity for everyone to benefit.

I know that successful people go out there with an agenda, not just for their meeting, but with whom they meet. That doesn’t feel right to me. I probably won’t make as much money because of it. But, for me, the relationships that get built are more meaningful.

All that is to say, if I ask to meet with you, it is because I want to meet with you. If you give me a project or a job or connect me to someone who will, great. If I do the same for you, wonderful. If we have coffee and never speak again, that’s okay, too. For me, the idea is kind of about hospitality.

Put good intentions out into the world and hope for the best for everyone, not just for yourself. At least, that’s where my head is at.